Is adulthood governed by childhood experiences?

Introduction

Most of us have little recollection of our first two or three years of existence, but our earliest experiences can impact us far into adulthood.

Experts are still attempting to figure out how much it effect and impact us. Two studies examine at how parents’ conduct in their children’s early years influences their lives decades later, and how temperament variations in children play a role.

The first research, published in Child Development , discovered that a child’s psychological support during his or her first three and a half years had an impact on his or her schooling, social life, and sexual relationships even 20 or 30 years later.

Babies and toddlers who were reared in loving and supportive homes performed better on standardised exams later in life and were more likely to get advanced degrees as adults. They were also more inclined to get along with their classmates and be content in their intimate relationships.

When we analyse how childhood experiences influence adulthood, take example of an insecure child with overprotective parents: he may develop a fear of strangers and prefer to spend time with family rather than meeting up with friends. As this individual grows older, the society and surroundings in which he lives in may compel him to interact with others and distance himselves from the parents which he might find difficult to cope up.

Thus different childhood experiences may shape who you become as an adult.

Here are some tips suggested by therapists:

For Parents

• In a loving, supportive atmosphere, everyone flourishes. According to research, children who have parental support perform better academically. When we examine unsupportive parents, kids will have a sense of independence and may not follow regulations, making it harder for them to obey rules and take instructions as an adult.
• Micromanaging children’s activities out of worry that they would make poor judgments can cause them to become too dependent on others or have unrealistic expectations of others responsibilities as they grow up. They may struggle to make decisions as adults, resulting in poor self-esteem or a lack of confidence in their talents.
• The degree to which youngsters are bonded to their parents determines whether they grow up to be well-adjusted adults. Stable attachments aid academic, social, and mental development, and children who have secure bonds are less likely to use drugs.

For adults with adverse childhood experience

Our early experiences form our perceptions of ourselves, others, and the world. As a result, we develop rules in order to safeguard our self-esteem, which might leave us susceptible. As a result, we develop dysfunctional behaviours, which can lead to mental health issues.

• As an adult, learning about the impact of childhood trauma may be rather unsettling. People who had challenges as youngsters, on the other hand, should not get discouraged or lose hope. The sun always rises again, no matter what has transpired in the past. Healing, progress, and recovery are all possibilities.
• Practicing thankfulness is one of the most effective methods to overcome bad memories. Adults who pursue hobbies and extracurricular activities not only grow as people, but they also get a sense of self and have something to look forward to. It’s critical for childhood trauma survivors to understand that their previous experiences do not have to dictate the rest of their lives. Everyone has the ability to influence their own destiny and quality of life.
• Your history has no bearing on your future. We are frequently constrained as children by the restrictions and constraints imposed by our parents and other authority figures. However this does not set limitation to what one can achieve as an adult.

Conclusion

Childhood trauma can have long-term consequences, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You have the ability to recover. You have the ability to modify your life as an adult. Start by taking the first step.

Past doesn’t define your future, your thinking does.

- Swati Kewlani